Don't usually do these posts, but I have a lot of little odds and ends to blab about, so here goes:
1. I love looking at the pictures of me in my Halloween dress. I've been feeling out of shape and gross and blobby because I haven't worked out for a MONTH (oh my god)... but eating right has always been about 90% of the battle for me. When I eat right, I look good. And I like seeing the pictures that prove that! Disclaimer: Of course, exercise makes me look REALLY good and feel REALLY good, but I've been grieving, depressed, exhausted and busy. Exercise will start soon (I think in November we will start up our gym membership again and I can do some strength training during my lunch hour... right now, I am just walking at lunch).
2. I stepped in poop in the living room at 6:30 this morning. Sometimes it is really hard to remember why having a dog is a good thing.... grumble.
3. The doggy daycare has been insane the last two times I have dropped Koda off: Tuesday, a lady was covered in blood and sobbing, barefooted... obviously something had happened to her dog and she had rushed to the vet with nothing but her dog and her car keys. I wanted to cry for her :( Thursday (today), a lady jumped out of a cab, yelling that she had an emergency with her dog that was in a carrier... turns out she had just come from the airport where they wouldn't let her dog on the plane because she didn't have any health papers for him and she needs a vet RIGHT NOW to give her papers for him (nevermind that she wasn't even a patient at this vet and they had no idea who she was).... that is not an emergency, that is poor planning... what happened on Tuesday was an emergency.
4. Mailing out the Thank You cards for people who gave flowers/mass cards for my dad... I hate wrapping these things up. As if, if I didn't finish them... he's not REALLY gone. There are a few more steps before it feels totally final: getting his car into our names, selling it... getting the house into our names, getting his accounts into our names... once those are finished, it's done. :(
5. I am going to have wine with some girlfriends tonight. I've been eating really healthy and really paleo since Friday, so I am going to allow myself two (big) glasses of wine tonight.
6. I admit I really am kind of confused how some people's bodies don't lose weight when they are 200-250 pounds and they are eating 800-1200 calories a day. I eat a MINIMUM of 1800 calories a day, I weigh 122 pounds and I still lose weight here and there (if I stay closer to 1800 than 2000 I will lose weight). And I used to be 200 pounds, so it's not like I am some skinny girl with no perspective. However, I don't live their lives and I don't know their bodies... they could have thyroid issues or something similar. I just am shocked that is a reality for people, to eat so little and stay heavy... and I see so many blogs where women seem to have this problem, I am scared that in 10, 15, 20 years, as my metabolism and hormones change, I will be in the same boat as these women I read.
7. I hope that didn't sound insensitive. I never want to come off like I don't have sympathy for other people's lives. I do. I have endless sympathy and feeling for most everyone in my life (real and online). Sometimes I keep things off my blog because, even though I am genuinely questioning something and want to have some outside input, I don't want to upset people. It's always been a thing with me: keeping my mouth shut just in case it might put someone off.
8. I made a 6.5 pound pork loin at the beginning of the week (and it came out AMAZING, with a sage crust and a bit of olive oil, cooked for 3.5 hours)... it has fed Chris and I lunch every day this week and a dinner for each of us! Best 12 dollars I ever spent :D
9. I watch all the scary/gory/horror/violent shows... Walking Dead, American Horror Story, even Boardwalk Empire is super violent/gory. With my dad's death, I have actually been uncomfortable with these shows lately.... death is not something I want to think about right now! I need to watch more silly shows at night.
10. I feel better after my day off yesterday. I got a lot done, but I also got to rest my mind a little. Did a lot of cat snuggling. The dog was kind of annoying yesterday... I took him for two long walks and played with him and he still was a hyper freak at nighttime AND pooped in the house while I slept. I am feeling more like a cat person and less like a dog person every day.