Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Lonely Walk

It is 32° in my neck of the woods, but sunny with blue sky, so I am out and about on my breaks, walking.

I used to see about a dozen other people when I went walking on my breaks, but as the weather has turned colder, I am the only one out here anymore.



So, I feel a little bit more alone as I walk through the silent parking lot. I already am missing out on some social time during work because my coworkers all go to the cafeteria during break time.

It's a choice I've made, and I'm happy about, in the end. I like getting fresh air. I like feeling the sun on my skin (just my face, now, as I am all bundled up!). I like getting my blood flowing. I like hitting my step goals for the day.

And, I haven't really "clicked" with anyone at work, so I'm not even really sure who I would talk to on my breaks. I have really good friends outside of work and I'm overall happy with my social life. But I just have to deal with feeling a little bit lonely during the day at work. It's just a strange thing to grapple with - I'm not sad or anything, I just feel odd not really conversing during the day (which is better, in the end, as there is a fair amount of workplace gossip here that is better for me to stay out of!).

I feel a bit like the office weirdo :)

I should tell you I am still applying for other jobs (jobs more related to my field of study or jobs I would more enjoy doing or, yeah, jobs that would pay more!). So keep good thoughts for me! I would love to better my overall life and perhaps make our financial situation a little more secure. We have been seeing a financial adviser to get better at saving for the immediate and distant future, and he's been really helpful. But there is a certain point at which you can't make your life better/more secure without more income. Working on it!

Looking forward. Learning to stay positive or at least hopeful even when life seems to be just one big messy struggle. Remembering that there is joy, even if you are worrying about bills. Remembering to be thankful for my health, my family, the fact that I have food and shelter and warmth in my life! Knowing it is okay to strive for better and still be grateful for what I have :)

So, that's what has been going on with me. Doing what I know how to do and trying to do better, too.


5 comments:

  1. Your coworkers might not know they are welcome to join you! Maybe consider sending an email to them or posting a flier starting a walking club? Coworkers don't have to turn into best friends, but having cool people to talk to at work can be nice :) It's possible they feel intimidated because they aren't as fit as you and (it sounds like) no one in the office has ever done anything like lunchtime walks.

    Just a thought :)

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    1. You are definitely right, I should be more proactive on inviting people to join me. The couple girls in the office I at least chat with during work hours, flat out told me that they could not imagine using their break times to walk! It turned me off, but there are probably people who would walk with me that I don't even know about.

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  2. Maybe you could suggest that you, as a group, start out slow. Maybe 10 or 15 minutes. Better to be together in numbers, at a slower pace for you for a few days a week, then lonely by yourself....?

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  3. You can't beat a good walk - dress up to suit the weather.

    It may be an idea to invite others .....interesting to see.

    But keep walking ......movement for us is good

    All the best Jan

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  4. Is there one coworker you talk to more than the others? You could always suggest going out for a quick walk together, as Monique suggested, and see what she says. It's always a good idea to stay out of office gossip/politics, but during a walk, you can always chat about other things. P.S. I take my walks alone when I go out at lunch. Sometimes I get lucky and spot Everset the Husky with her puppy dad. :-)

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