I haven't been mentioning it here on the blog, but I am feeling really sleep deprived!! Things just haven't gone back to normal since I got home from Japan. Lots of weird nightmares and waking up not knowing where I am, waking up at 3 or 4 AM and not being able to fall back asleep, etc. This is leading to daytime naps and general fatigue. So weird!
I'm working on it: limiting caffeine, trying to fight naps, going to bed at a reasonable time, all that. But my system got screwy and it seems like it is going to take some time to get back on track.
In the meantime, I am really fighting the HUNGER that comes with tiredness. (Man, that correlation sucks)
I've done a good job so far by drinking lots of water, as I am back down to 120.8 this morning but I worry about Halloween!! CANDY!
I don't bring candy into the house but I am hanging out with friends tonight and tomorrow who I know have huge bowls of crappy, processed, delicious, addictive candy in their houses.
Easy solution: don't go.
But not a good, healthy, sane decision! I need people in my life, especially because Chris is gone for the week. I need to socialize, chat, laugh, etc. I get sad when I'm alone for too many days. This is my third day at home with just the animals for company. I need humans!
Well, I'm putting it out there on this blog that I will NOT eat any candy tonight or tomorrow. If I put it out there in the world then I have a better chance of success. I don't know if I'll be perfect or succeed, especially since I am battling with this tiredness and hunger but damn it I will try my best. I'm worth not filling my body with crap (and now I just have to really believe it!!!!).
I am where I want to be for Sunday, all I have to do is stay here!
I'm going to visualize myself on the tattoo table, in front of people, torso bared. I will visualize myself trim, not bloated, healthy and proud.
I watched some episodes of the Biggest Loser yesterday and Jillian said something to the effect of "If you have a WHY, the how won't matter." I really liked that. My WHY is comfort in front of people and pride in myself. I have up to 8 hours to get tattooed on Sunday, I really want to feel good in those hours (especially since its my MARRIAGE tattoo- I don't want bad feelings associated with that!!)
Okay, off to grab a yogurt and walk the dog! Start the day off right to end it right :)