So, obviously, the world didn't end. Being an archaeologist/anthropologist and a generally educated woman, I didn't expect it to.
Here's is what I am hoping for though: that the solstice yesterday that also marked the end of a Mayan cycle of time WAS an end. An end of a cycle. A start of something new. Something fresh.
This year has been crazy. And hard. And the past few months for me and LOTS of people I know have been especially difficult. And dark.
There have been deaths and losses. Bad job situations. Tragedies. Weird things happening. Accidents.
And they have been increasing in frequency.
And there has been a general malaise or sadness hanging around.
Even I have been hopeless at times.
But, this ending of a cycle, this solstice (which often signifies the start of a new season or a change).... I am hoping it brings fresh energy, fresh moods, and new beginnings for me and the people I love. And the world at large.
I woke up happy. I had a really good day yesterday. A really fun work holiday party where everyone was relaxed and lots of the work tension of the year seemed to dissipate. Then we went to a "It Might Be The End Of Your World, But It Ain't Mayan" party where I wore a slinky little dress, did not overeat (but did have several drinks) and laughed and chatted with lots of people that I love. A very good night.
I wake up happy and hopeful.
It's been hard going. But I have been holding on (even if sometimes I have been holding on to fraying threads with a trembling hand) and waiting for life to turn around. For good things to start outweighing the bad. To smile more than I cry. It has been three months to the day that I found my dad and my life changed forever. I am still grieving, I still miss him. But I am hoping my grief starts to lighten.
Today is a little bigger for me than New Years Day, I have more dreams for what is coming and more determination to make the coming days good ones.
Do good and healthy and loving things for yourself and others as the holidays continue!