Thursday, December 10, 2015

My mom body -_-

Things are going well with Hunter - we're learning every day, trying to figure out how best to feed him, how to get in some sleep, etc. It's super hard but I think going pretty well!

On the other hand, I'm having some body image freak outs. I purposely haven't looked at myself naked in the mirror since birth and finally did today. I knew my body shape would be different but I'm pretty dismayed at how it's changed. The mom pouch/hanging belly I've developed depresses me. I know I'll lose weight in the next months to year, especially as I re-adopt my eating and fitness habits. But I'm sad to know I'll probably never look how I used to (with a soft but mostly flat belly!) and I won't be fitting back into my clothes in a cute way (so many of my clothes were very form-fitting and will now highlight a droopy, chubby belly).

So that's the truth, just being honest about it. The sadness about the loss of my old body is there - but it is not detracting from the joy in the rest of my life, don't worry :) I just did not want to pretend that everything is completely hunky-dory over here!

I'm getting back to eating well. I decided to start tracking my food again, because I'm pretty sure I was over eating by thousands of calories a day, because I was so tired and so hungry and so stressed and so emotional. I'm not giving myself a goal or a limit on my calories, but just tracking food so that I am more thoughtful and not going crazy with sweets or junk food.

Fitness will come next year, once I'm cleared for more than just walking!

So that's where I am - facing the reality of my body, definitely bummed about it, but moving on and getting back to a focus on health so that I can feel better about myself :)


  1. Don't worry..that sadness most likely post-psrtum hormonal thing. You can and you will have a non - pregnant body back's only a matter of time :) You were fit and healthy and very active going into your pregnancy AND you did a great job ( very smart!) on not gaining extra weight. Congrats!! Try to be patient and just get back into moving more and eating less carbs...and the best of all ? Your wonderful body gave you your adorable healthy son . :)

  2. I agree, you can have a non-baby body back. My daughter's midwife said "it takes nine months to get that body and nine months for it to go"... be patient. I had horrendous stretch marks all over me - like Jack the Ripper had let loose on me. At least (by the sound of it) that's not the case with you.

  3. You had a baby. You had abdominal surgery. I don't think you should think "this is how it is going to be" until you are past the one year mark. A full year. My suggestion is once you are cleared, start Pilates, very slowly. Yoga and Pilates, in addition to your walking, will do more than you think right now, looking in the mirror.

  4. I agree, too. It may seem at this point that you'll never get your pre-baby body back, but your body is going to do an amazing job at getting back (or at least close to) your pre-baby state. But it will take time. It was relatively quick and easy to get back to my pre-baby body when I had my older son, but I was in my early 20s. When I had the kid in my late 30s, it took a LOT longer (over a year, but I also didn't make the best food choices and didn't exercise much initially).

    Enjoy this very special time in your baby's life! I so know that it's not easy, but it's such special time that goes by soooo quickly....

  5. I ditto Vickie and Andrea. My shape changed slightly, but as another C-section mom, take time to heal up, eat whole real foods, and you'll get most of your clothes back 1-2 years down the road.

    Not forever, not quite the same,but just as awesome. As lean as you desire. As muscular as you need for long hikes and hauling a baby/toddler around. Change is constant with kids and life. Here's to riding those waves. It's not like US magazine, for most women, it takes time.

    Here's to accepting where you are and for some women, the changes will come after they are done breast feeding- so a little longer than 1-2 years. ONWARD. Kids are a real gift. You bore life. Epic and about 70-100 hormones involved. You had the kid 2 seconds ago. Give yourself the gift of self acceptance.

  6. I know the feeling- although I never had a good body like you!! LOL

    It does take a while for your body to snap back, but it will do so naturally too. Don't worry. I think I read somewhere that it can take a year for a woman to fully recover from pregnancy.

    Hormones are so powerful, aren't they? It helps when you can recognize that's what's causing your feelings and not something else. Hang in there, sweetie!